. >> i was back here on february 11 to welcome home members of the brigade combat team in afghanistan. 155 of you got off that plane in the middle of the night. the only thing more exciting seeing you getting off is watching your captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org >> tonight what's next for al qaeda besides freaking out every time they hear a helicopter? then a new government intrusion into our private lives. i thought they were only supposed to do that to gay people. and my guest john bradshaw has a new book about dog behavior. bad news, mr. bradshaw, dogs can't read. (laughter) >> stephen: sarah palin claims she knows all the lettering-- lyrics to rapper's delight, alaska karaoke bars, you've been warned. this is "the colbert report." captioning sponsored by comedy central ( theme song playing ) ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: whooo! whooo! >> stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen! (cheers and applause) >> stephen: welcome to the report. thank you for joining us. nation, barack obama is